Tribute to failure

my instruments keep me
from the greatest prize of them all
the accolade above me
too far to reach
too exquisite to touch
my dreams
keep my inspired mind on edge
as the time becomes vulnerable
the losing stream catches up to me again
til the bell in clocked
and the glass is split
my reality slips ahead of time
unconsciously
my mind keeps it’s distance
as tempers begin to rage
afar from the soft, cool gust
engaging my rippled intellect
can I keep varying my approach
or will this inconsistency prevail?
announcing my dreamt future
should satisfy me in part
but if this prophecy stays at bay
it’ll certainly be my last
with downfall imminent
the danger is felt
too close to comfort
i alone won’t stand the fight
my death speaks louder
than one touch too soon
acute chance of defining my mark
in a history too cruel to care
the final bend strikes me down
into an everlasting pit of despair
as my life
my team
my world
hastily removes its possessive clutches
from my feeble hands
i am no loser
just a mere puppet of entertainment
i shall not use this failure
or swipe this cards chance
the opportunity has passed me by
only with me to stare and cry

 

Self titled

Do or die
i’ve lost my claims
Felt my vanity slip away
Slowly He appears
From twilight
Towards me, still
Closer now
Ever so stealthily
He assumes his position
i knelt back to avoid the shame;
Failure at its highest peak
Spurned by myself
Cast aside
By all who ever loved
He enters now
Gaining me with every breath
i await the inevitable
With one lethal look
He uncovers my sorrow
Shutting out any glimpse of hope
Inspiration is the key
Locked up for eternity
Derailing me from this nightmare
Seems almost impossible
He grasps my neck
In full conviction
i take my last breath
Closer now, still
He silhouette
Beckons my eyes to shut
This creeping, stalking, deadly devil
Takes all that is left
Dignity, wasted away
Assurance, taken for good
Belief, removed indefinitely
And faith insures
Do or die
Death does not part
Only life awaits

Void Email

**Heres another i Guess...**

Eleven thirty
Lifes one last thought
Bought in one instant
Lives change forever

My world turned upside down
Cannot control His love
Its incomprehensible
Death has become life

Slavery to myself
Whilst being hid in the darkness
Blinded from truth
Through unappreciated lies

Have I learnt my lesson?
Whats to change
Do I look back on the past?
Whats to leave out

My dissociation from the one I love
Has cost me my freedom
Intentioned driven life
Consequently who believes?

Deciding which way is which
Discretion or discernment
Filling up with death
Blank pages ruined my life

Help I cried out for
Grace demonstrated power
Automatically
My faith was bolstered

Looking back
Choosing life changed mine
Reminiscing
For all He’s worth

Oops Barcelona won Champions league!! who woulda thought? 

Essence is something

**I wrote this poem a long while ago, I never knew I could write like this... but anyways here it is, let me know what u think**

lives of enduring love
grace surpasses our failure
looking to the skies for a glimpse of hope
my sundried heart still thirsts

a faith untroubled
a will unhindered
selflessness is the gateway to humility
justice will be demonstrated accordingly

disobedience sparks furry
whilst fear drives me further away
my attention shifts away as
i begin to stumble

the pressures of a life to the full
potentially being the best I can be
circuming to the efforts of the flesh
has the will of the almighty been carried out?

time ticks on till death do us part
or will the vow of one involve us all?
concentrating on change
we forget who’s staying the same

representing a begotten man
traipsing through each new day
too afraid to act on instinct
too afraid to give myself up

complicated lives of few
illustrated beings of course
willingly allowing their paths to venture
out into the decorated desert

i want to be all I can be
i choose gain not loss
yet loss so active in me
is the one way for me to gain.

almost next term....wel 2days away

I gotta get through yet another term of school. starting monday we have like 15 days till exams so im not really looking forward to them, but i am almost ready for this term just a few more preparations and i'll be set! I got an A agregate in the last term so I hope that I'll be able to repeat that. The school seems to pile on the distractions this term, with our matric dance coming up, theres the grade 11 fashion show and of course between my hockey practices and matches and band practices im gonna be rather busy. But its all good 4 my God is always here with me, always faithful never giving up on me, even though if I had the choice I woulda given up on myself ages ago! Wel heres to another year 4 Jesus!

I'm gonna tip Juventus for taking the Champions league this year. AC Milan or Barcelona probably will though, but we'll see. 

yes probably the worst but humorous movie ever made : NAPOLEAN DYNAMITE 

So funny has anyone seen this flash video?? 

God's faithful as can be

hey still suffering here with all the work, can barely breathe only my Jesus keeping my awake and alive. It amazing how faithful He is down to the most intimately detail. this week i had to do something quite important and have been desiring for it to happen 4 a while and i have been praying about it and God answered it down to the detail. it was so fulfilling being in His will at the right place and right time. Its a satisfaction you cant find anywhere else on the planet but close in His arms. till next time>>

matric work is gang hard

hey matric is really hard at the moment so all i've been doing this week from 3 in the afternoon til sometime at night is doing work, which is a real change 4 me as i have been rapidly shifted out of my oh so comforting zone into a fast pace realtiy were i have responsibilities and things to get through. its hard and i dont deserve to do well, no matter how hard i study, i dont deserve to accomplish anything of worth - but only by the love of God can i do anything of worth and receive Him in a new fulfilling way. He is deserving, He is the only one.
God bles5.
dan

im a winner

ok i failed my learners license exam by 1 mark. so you can assume that i am a bit bummed and am feeling down, but i realised that even though i had people praying for me and i was regularly praying to God myself, i had belief that it was in the bag. but afterwards it hit me like a tonn of bricks: i dont deserve anything. all i deserve is death, not to do well or to even pass, so who am i to start complaining that i've been through the study booklet 4 times? Even though i didnt believe it at all, I apprehended that i obviosly didnt study hard enough or put enough effort in. Thats what it boils down to. walking out of the place i just prayed to my Jesus that i would remain faithful to him no matter what. that means that i dont imediately point the finger in his direction or at the examiner. Its by His grace that i acomplish anything or worth so thats what im still searching towards.

Hello Wisconsin!

I woke at 6:01am this morning, having to attend tennis practice, it was cold and early but i trudged my way there instead of procrastinating and thinking up more excuses. On arrival, knowing we may have a new coach i was unsure of what to expect and notice only one person on the court. After a few minutes another arrives and another, stacking us at four people, to the expected 8. Our coach somehow new my name and said she has the same surname as me, which was even more unexpected, moving along swiftly we had to warm up & stretch! which I never do! So already things were looking interesting. But all in all i enjoyed myself and realised how much i need to practice more.

So i guess in retrospect i look back on today with a changed heart, or do i? my life, my purpose, my vision, hopes dreams and aspirations all wrapped into one fulfilment of a promise to a man called Abraham.

Love came
fought fairly and
He took what was His
won over His belongings
Isnt ready to leave
just yet

blessings.

its like its all empty but full at the same time. like somethings missing but everything is all there at least you hope so! i used to feel like this 

matric

Im just starting my last year at high school this week and already I cant wait for it to end. I have had to decide what to study where to go what to do etc for my tersiary education vibez, and it has been hard but just the other day it all clicked! what im doing, where im going and hopefully, when im going! talking many a cloud photo as usual, they look so amazing in places where I live. God's glory is on display all the time, just notice it. I believe that when we look ahead to things in life, even if its something that we are preparing to enjoy eg: lunch time or something more difficult to enjoy eg: studying, we have a pre-conceived notion or a presentiment about it. So regardless of what God has planned, we have our own ideas, which in actual fact I regretably confess that it is human to be like that. but why? maybe its because we are made to anticipate various things and occasionally react to them before they have manifested. Sometimes I find myself reacting in a particular way to absolutely nothing because I acted in advance and it never came. Was it going come, or was it my incorrect judgement? If it was never there my so called intuition failed me miserably. Denial is the most predictable of all human responces just to let you know that so next time you think, "oh it cant be" or, "never, not in my town" think again.

TOP 5

Hey havent posted in a while but here is a little thought that has entertained my mind for a while; I worked out the "TOP 5 MOST DISGUSTING PUBLIC THINGS". ranging from anywhere to anywhere, they are yeah well here they are:

1. You know the good old door nob yes it sounds not to bad but seriously people with upwashed hands and food etc etc have just grabbed and twisted it all over, not nice. The real problem is knowing all this but not being able to do anything about it, you gotta touch them!

2. the lid of a bin it is where we are supposed to put our rubbish but if you think about it, its where people have just eaten and havent cleansed their hands, and touch it eeerrr its disgusting!

3. the infamous banister of a staircase or handrail or escalator rail. They are everywhere. the shops, apartments, office building even inside lifts! these are touched everyday by thousands of people and probably dont get cleaned very often, even at all.

4. number four, the public shower. you know at the gym or in a public bathroom. You can even get athletes foot passed on through those showers!

5. The worst by far are those plastic shower curtains that stick to your body when you enter those showers, they never go where you want them to go and they are always a dim mustard colour with faded flowers. stay away, even if it means not showering for weeks!

Thank you 4 listening to my pearls of wisdom. if you have any other "top disgusting public things" - please leave a comment.

DELIRIOUS CONCERT

Hey im just back from yes u guessed it, Delirious concert in cape town, south africa my home town! it was amazing, they were every bit as good as i thought they were. They played new songs and the golden oldies, but overall I give it a smashing 9/10. the last point being lost cause the words didnt work on the screen:( hopefully someday I will be up there with those guys or guys like those!

all right the new Hillsong United has been recorded and is in the making I cant wait til it comes out next year! 

Temperamental

HEY => havent chatted in a while but here I am. Ok seriously whats going on with "the Group"? No one seems to be posting out of all like 13 people on the site! oh well I suppose that includes me.
Apparently Delirious is coming to South Africa on the 3rd of december and its only R60 which is so cheap! I cant wait.

But yeah at the moment I have exams like everyone else, and no matter how hard I study and try my best I will never deserve anything: like good marks or by practising something alot and winning a prize I dont deserve that stuff at all. Why not?

Which is kind of hard to comprehend cause what if I work really hard and for a long time and aquire alot of money, do I deserve to buy a car or something? These blessing that we attain for ourselves which we think had nothing to do with God, are they really ours? Did we work sufficiently enough for them for us to deserve them? The reality is that the only thing we deserve is death

Ouch - its true though what Jesus did on the cross was more than sufficient for us, and all the blessing we receive are from God, for that is His desire. He wants to bless, anoint, equip and discipline us.

Peace in.
dan:)

I live in South Africa an we dont have any volcanoes here or earthquakes or even hurricanes for that matter, but its just amazing hw powerful God is, and how Jesus has all power over nature in every aspect, be glad this doesnt happen in your town! 

Probe, probes and more bicycles

Hey you know in the bible it says rejoice always right? Thats something that I like to model my life on and always to remember that and to pray that and in that is important, but yesterday I asked myself why do i rejoice? Like what is the reason for me to do all this rejoicing? I thought of 4 basic things:

1. Gods creation
2. Sent Jesus to die 4 us
3. Saved me and is workingin my life
4. Jesus is coming back an I'll check him in heaven.

Ok so that was what i found but my Q is: Do we rejoice in God for what He's done ie: all that stuff and obviously more and our testemonies etc or in do we rejoice in who He is. Like His caracter cause I thought in who He is, overflows what He does. Its sort of the same in us, for we were made in His likeness. And if we have God's love living and breathing inside of us then we do things out of the overflow of that love. Anyways what do you think?

New Findings!

Actually I didnt find anything but what I did make is a new word today! Ok I dont officially have my own language just yet, but we'll see after a few years...
The word is, ok just wait for it, ok here:
"Heterodiphobia"
Ok you probably thinking "Oh i know what that means." but think no you dont sorry, its not a word until now, as soon as i post this article. And yes I do know what it means! I didnt just make it up and not understand what it means. The meaning is:
Hetero meaning different
di meaning two
phobia meaning to have a fear of something
Now if you put that all together you get: Being afraid of two things that are different. For example in a maths sum when you are supposed to get two answers that are the same but instead get two that are completely different. How irritating is that?

Heres it in a sentence: "My teacher came home and phoned my mom inquiring about the fact that i had attained 73% on my report card for biology not realising that I had infact been sick the previous week with Laryngitis because I went to England and caught the sickness on the way back in the aeroplane from the man sitting next to me who had his left index finger missing from a freak chainsaw accident, after hearing his story it was lunch time and the airhostess was drawing near and I was really in the mood for Chicken and carrots that day, but suddenly thought to myself, what if she doesnt say 'beef or chicken' and says 'we only have beef and rice today, sorry'. After going through a short stage of heterodiphobia, i thought and then came to the understanding and self-actualisation that it was a short flight and they were only serving drinks."

My friends I made on mission 

My friends I made while on Mission 

God's Mysterious Missions

Hey I arrived back here in Cape Town 24hrs ago from being in a little town called Prince Albert. I went up with 12 other ambassadors for Christ as we planned to bring the gospel in a tangible form to the people for a week.

We did a lot of things and God really working through us which rocked. The problem with going on mission and doing a lot of things for God is you can very easily get burnt out and tired, which happened to a few of our team members but not too bad.

When we arrived we thought that the guys were going to stay in the church hall and the girls in hosted homes which weren’t the case when we got there, so all 13 of us had to go and stay in one big house all together. Now this was weird but we realised afterwards how God had a hand in on the situation, for if we hadn’t been together we would not have been able to have any planning meetings or devotions at the night time which we did everyday! I still don’t know what we would have done.

We ran a holiday club for the little kids like age 3-12. We had games and song time and did plays and skits for them. We went really spiritual and then did like a message at the end of the day on the life of David in 1 Samuel.

That went well, the only problem here was communication because all the kids didn’t speak English only Afrikaans which none of us were exceptionally great at, we occasionally used our own translators to get the message across. That went fine and the kids understood.

The one day we were required to do an open-air meeting which is just going to a place in the city and start preaching with worship with a keyboard and sharing testimonies. I was required to give a salvation talk there, but it got cancelled so I didn’t prepare at all. Then we got told that we had to drop everything and go down there and do it!! Of course my heart sank as I hadn’t done much on my speech I had to deliver it anyways and it went well, Glory to God!

We ran youth programs in the night and taught the youth there, I also preached there on true freedom, with translation.

We attended the prison there and there were approximately 20 men there, we shared testimonies and did skits. It was interesting to see their reactions and their faith in God.

On the last day we did the altar call and about 80% of the kids came up and gave their lives to Christ and accepted His blood over their lives. We all made friendships there and are really keen to go back as you always are when you find a real gem of a place.

One thing I learnt is how easy it is to break down the unity within a group and how much unity plays a role. You need to know each others strengths, weaknesses and capabilities. With unity you go as fast as the slowest person and bring everyone through.

One thing I realised at the end was that I had had a holiday from my mission work in South Africa and was then doing God’s work elsewhere. Now that I’m back its not that I’m not on mission anymore or that I’m a lost cause that I’m not “officially” on mission, I’m back and prepared to go for God once more.

Duty Calls

God: "go"
Me: "where and when and why?"
God: "Don't hesitate, just obey"

Thats all He ultimately wants is for us 2 obey, I'm going on mission in 2days and no i dont know what I'm doing, or how things work, but all I can say is that my reliance on Him is so great right now its scary. Anyways have fun while I'm away its only a week, but it'll seem long. I'll tell u'all about it when I come back.
Peace in
dan

Returns from the outdoors...

... ie: camp

I went camping this weekend for our youth guys camp. there were like 47 of us including leaders as apposed to last years like 16. I must say i really learnt alot about how God works, He's revealing more and more to me every day. Some of the things we got up to on camp, was braaing (cookin on a fire) an cooking bacon an eggs on skottles (gas heaters) very nice stuff i must admit. We played many sports including soccer, cricket, one bounce an frisbee. We went to the beach an some guys played touch rugby and swam. People surfed and bodyboarded up and down the coast and we even found some time for a peaceful game of cards. Alot went on in our camp and we met new people and got to know others alot better.

Anyways onto what really happened and what God was really on about on our camp* We had a few guys share their testimonies of what God had done in their lives and how they found Christ, and what really stood out for me, was their amazing humility in it all. Because they had endured really hard lives, made incorrect decisions, opted for the worlds way, they had quite a great story, but yet its encouradgeing to see their humility in it all. They had to again make some hecticly difficult decisions to get themselves outer the matter, but God was still their constant. He was the only thing never changing, always the same, Jesus never left them once they had accepted Him and never changed during their lives, they can all testify to that and so can I.

We had awesome prayer times and the funny thing was we went to go pray because we were bored and had nothing better to do! God decided He was keen and rocked up and really spoke to all of us. Thats happened to me before, I once went to go pray just to get out of doing a chore with a guy and we really felt God's presence, so God can rock up, no matter what your circumstances are.

So now where does that leave us? I am now going to not worry about the past or the future anymore, but concentrate on God and just ultimately be at peace with Him and others and to rejoice always. God doesnt say rejoice when you are feeling happy or when you are feeling down. He says rejoice always! No matter how you are feeling.

Peace in
dan*

Thank God that He made you the way He did and don't look at the outside of someone and imediately judge them, get to know them and love them and find out about their lives before you judge them and write them off your list of friends... and SMILE!!! 

Heys sum arb quotes/slash/sayings i acquired:

1.The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowlingball wouldn't.
2.Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.
3.The plan was simple, like my brother Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan justmight work.
4.The dandelion swayed in the gentle breeze like an oscillating electric fanset on medium.
5. It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to a cylindrical steel pipe.

10 tips for life as we know it?

Havnt posted much recently besides pictures so heres a treat:

1. We've been watching movies in english,
2. I had fun at youth tonight,
3. Lost my hockey match (yes T i did),
4. Been having awesome prayer times at night before I go sleep,
5. Received admin ie:got in trouble from some people, suffered the affects
6. Missing the rugby tomorrow between South Africa and The All Blacks
7. Have to study for my science test
8. Its been raining excessively
9. Going out to a youth training session tomorrow
10. Shared my testamony

Now those are just some of the things which are going on in my life in about the last week, and yeah they're important stuff, some of the things and yes God has used me and taught me in some of them, but really what do they amount to? I mean if someone asked me what I've done in the last week, I would have probably just babbled on about those things right there. Complained abit about things out of my control, but overall God should come out on top and receive all the Glory from our lives right? He should be praised and honoured in everything we do as believers in Christ.
Its a pitty that that doesnt always happen. We can be all "super spiritual" and think those happen and talk about it, but thats a face to everyone else and they'll find out sometime. We can't pray to God and say: "Lord we give you praise, glory, honour and power" if we arent ACTUALLY DOING IT. its called lying, look it up. We actually need to live a life worthy of Jesus, and do what He would have done in situasions and act like He would, thats giving Him praise and honouring His "legacy". Thank Him for coming out on top in all situations, and praise His name for delivering you out of everything you cannot handle for that is a truth.

Peace in*
:D

Planet Shakers concert 

Scientology?

Woah i bet no one knows what Scientology is! its weird cultic group who have "the Church of Scientology" i mean please its so lame i cannot believe that some people can actually give in to stuff like this. www.scientology.org puts it bluntly:
"Definition: Founded by L. Ron Hubbard (1911-1986), a popular science fiction author, Scientology is supposed to be a science, a religion and a church. The basic book of Scientology is Dianetics: The Modern Science of Mental Health, published in 1950. "
A science, religion and a church? I've heard about intergration and I totally agree with incorparating God into your life but this is starting to sound like Christian Science. I've had enough I gonna take a break.

wow check that baby* 

hectic blast

Cost i've been receiving a bit of heat from the stuff I've been putting up on my blog so I gonna be toning it down 4 a while, cause yeah I dont want any admin 2 deal with at the moment! But yeah its all good though cause isnt that what blogs are used for hey?
I have also been reading this Powerful praying book recently, its pretty good I guess, I dont seem to read alot of those type of books, I stick to the newspaper, because if it takes the place of the Bible, then it is not being used for what it was intended for. Its an addition to what you may or are currently reading in the Bible, as to add to your knowledge and offer you more information on a particular topic, which the Bible may not expand as much as you would have liked it to.
few...

PINK!! would you like a pink car?  

comment...

Here is a comment I found on a site http://attherighthand.net its really awesome

God gets no glory when we say things like; “I am so worried about thus and so,” “I am afraid this or that will happen,” “ I do not believe I can do all things,” “I just can’t do it”, “I have this wrong with me,” “ I'm so sick I do not know if I will ever get better,” “God healed me of this but I still have this wrong with me,” I am sick, tired, afraid, scared, worried, lonely, crazy, fearful, and bad always happens to me. When we talk and we use these words in a our conversation, God gets no glory in them. You give the devil all the praise. Because Christ came and paid the price for all these things and you do not acknowledge the fact that He did. No matter what you might think God’s glory comes in goodness. All things come together for good to those who love the Lord. But God gets glory for the good not the bad. God’s glory comes in the resurrections. God gets no glory from crucifixion. Crucifixion is the devils way of saying I rule can you not see that?

So actually do that and listen to that.

New Hillson cd made in February this year 

thats the new cd "nothing is sound" 

New Switchfoot CD coming out real soon, go check thsir site for the pic, it checks really awesome I cant wait! 

its all about light composition... 

university and beyond

To the stars and beyond, is that where I wana go? Do I wana do the absolute best I can for myself or to satisfy myself as much as I can with "happy" things? I thought maybe it was for me and that was what I wanted...

till I found it that it wasnt about me, and what I thought was good, or what I wanted. Sure it would be great to take a gap year, and travel the world, or just sit around and get a part time job and just "chill" for a while?

Its something you do need to think about sometime, but it is also something that you can choose not to worry about. I like to think I've chosen that line but sometimes I'm not always so sure but its all good I guess.

So yeah as in all situasions (almost) you can choose to do a minimum of two things and I'm gonna choose the "I'm not gonna worry bout it one" or yeah I just want God to put me in the best place He can to use me and for God thats not gonna be too difficult.

anyways
peace in
cheers

Ruffled Feathers

Castaway

He gets swept ashore
The sun shelters his every path
Not realising the ramifications
He moves on

In search for She
He does not find

Astounded by the lack of interest
His confusion gets him no where
The love of a mate
She drives his heart

Around in a circle he travels

Remembering a once thriving twosome
His despair is unnatural
This isolation too much to handle

He cannot discover She's hiding place

The one and only shelter begins to die out
As the horizon creeps upward

He, the lonesome ostrich waits for his mate, She

Residents Quest

Through the kitchen, into the lounge
this bare house screaming out its nakedness

With paint stricken walls, I cast my eyes to the floor
the carpets ripped and torn, plain and dusty

I sought out a bathroom and with my bare feet on the cold tiles,
a chill runs down my back

As I gaze into the murky waters of the basin,
my own lack of reflection calms my insecurity

The sound of creaking floorboards echo as I wander down the passage
tip toe, my heartbeat is the only thing left to listen to

As I approach the staircase, my hand reaches out to grasp the oak banister
with the wind whistling, I make the assent

As my fingertips brush over the cold, wet windows
I gaze out, wondering about a life out there

I reach the highest room, once utilized, now just a lonely, empty memory
my feet cushioned by the damped floorboards

I took a deep breath
the mildew taste in the air was sour

I never knew how I got in
and I’ll never know how I’ll get out